Kevin's Musings

Well I'm not on probation anymore

Tue, 15 Dec 2009 14:53:57 GMT

So the 6 months as full time is done today so I can use my vacation time and I'll likely get an evaluation soon since John likes to do them at least twice a year.

I feel a bit weird in that I'm still looking around for a job elsewhere. But as I've mentioned I really think there will always be a part of me that feels a bit of a failure if I stay in Rolla. I never intended to be here for more than about 6 years and I'm pushing 17 now. I'm not unhappy and maybe it's just a "grass is always greener" syndrome but I'm pretty sure I can be happier. :)

And yeah I know I've been bad about updating this.

I just had a conversation in the hall about caching...

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 20:24:41 GMT

So does that mean my conversion to programmer geekdom has really happened? I've always been a geek, don't get me wrong, I just wondering if my hallway conversations are now about semi-advanced programming subjects if I've really become a more specific type of geek.

Of course geeks have sub categories!

Oh you're going to try and claim I'm a nerd because I subcategorize geeks? Nah, the difference between a geek and a nerd is more a social thing. Geeks can actually function in society if need be. :) Oh of course I can tell you the difference in the 2 terms. Essentially the people that were computer oriented coopted the word geek as a thing of pride. Nerd, despite the movies with it in the title, never managed to escape the negative stigma in any sector of society. :) Oh some nerds try to claim it, but even the geeks make fun of nerds. :) Or something like that, I'm pulling all this out of my ass. :)

No face to face interview

Tue, 17 Nov 2009 02:52:46 GMT

Got contacted today, not getting the face to face. If I'm to believe them I was ranked #6 (of 30) and they are only interviewing 5. Ah well. I did say I was going to be in the area anyway and would still be happy to interview, just in case they didn't want to pay travel. They have not responded to that e-mail yet. Ah well. It's got me thinking about doing some more applying anyway as I realized that while things here are not bad, I don't have reason to really stay either. Test the waters.

Strange exhaustion

Fri, 13 Nov 2009 19:54:15 GMT

As some of you may know, I've been suffering from exhaustion for no good reason since about the 2nd of November. I'm better, but I'm still tired and exercising is not really working all that well for me most days as if I get going I'm worn out much sooner than I should be. I have some blood work done and it's all normal. So I get to do a sleep trial on the 5th of Jan. I wish it were sooner as I hope there isn't something more serious going on. But that is the short of the doctors visit today.

Out of the blue interview

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 15:31:17 GMT

So I had a phone interview for a Project Management position up in Fargo, ND. It was a place I had put an application in with back in June, so I was surprised to be contacted. It went well. My broader range of experience in the IT field was a plus. Not having actual PM experience was a downside, but I do have management experience and skills and some of the PM stuff can be trained and they would likely pay for PRINCE2 certification if I got it anyway. Would not start till Jan if I get it. Pay range is $55 - $65K a year (significant increase in what I'm getting now). Will know if I make it to the face to face round in a week or two. That interview would likely be around Thanksgiving as that would accommodate my schedule better and it wouldn't be an issue for them (likely be the Friday after T-day). That was a little surprising to me, but I went with it.

I admit that I've been looking at more actively seeking different employment. It's not that I don't like Rolla, or this job. But I have a bit of an itch to move on to something else. I really want to get into management, that is not something that is likely to happen here. I want to be somewhere a bit more urban too. I think I just want more opportunities. But I'm aware of the economy. I'm aware of my downsides, but I'm also aware of my upsides too. :)

Heck I've not even been here all that long. I started as a temp last Nov, 2nd. I've only been full time since June 15th. But a lot has happened to me in this last year. A lot of it because of self determination too and I had let myself settle for jobs, settle for my situation in the past. I had let issues that I was aware of just sit, and it didn't work too well for me. I'm not getting into details here, but it ties in with my "contribution" to the marriage failing. It tied into me getting so mentally ill. Not even close to the whole story but I see the connections. I'm healthy again. I'm happy again. I know what I want, and while I don't have to aggressively pursue it, I will still pursue it. The phone interview just pushed the thought farther forward. So I've talked with a few people about helping me get some resources again to see what I can get. It might be a mistake too, but I don't think so and if it is, I know I can deal with some pretty crappy situations. :) Of course this time I have the luxury of being a bit more picky. I do like the job I have. I like the environment I work it. I can safely say no to offers. :)

But this is like my weight loss. I'm pretty much back to a healthy weight, I'm in a fit to acceptable range on body fat. But I know I that I can do better so I'm still working towards it. Not as hard as I could, it's not my highest priority goal. But I've been asked by co-workers and friends "Now that you hit your goal, what are you going to do?" The answer was set another goal and work towards it. If I do get into the 10-15% body fat range, then my next goal would be "Stay in this range for another 6 months or a year and then re-evaluate".

I fail to take control of things that I have control over still, but really that's the big thing. I have some control over several things right now that I can use to make myself happier so I'm at least doing something with that. :)

How I shed the weight

Thu, 29 Oct 2009 15:56:13 GMT

I've had a few people ask me what I did to shed the 50+ pounds in the last year. Readers of this journal and my notes on Facebook could see bits and pieces of it. I had an exercise log in here for a bit. I've mentioned bits and pieces here and there but I've not really put it all together. So I'm gonna do that here.

My plan/goal was to make this be a lifestyle change. To do things more slowly to make sure it stuck. I was unhappy with myself that had to change. It has changed. :)

The first thing is I needed was motivation for change. That was pretty easy for me. My life was in shambles and I had to turn it around. That meant mental and physical health. So motivation, check. :)

As to changes after getting motivated, the first change was actually made at the grocery store. I stopped buying a lot of the junk food I used to. I started buying a lot more fruit. I didn't stop buying soda, but I changed to diet. I increased my water intake. Eventually soda dropped from the menu. I still drink it but, as humorous as it may seem, I'm just a social soda drinker now and it's nearly always diet. Trying to drink eight 8oz glasses of water a day helped curb the desire for soda as well, I didn't need or want anything else to drink. Grabbing an apple, orange, or banana (the common fruits I get) helped curb the desire to grab a cupcake, twinkie, donut, etc.

This was not a wholesale overnight change. I still got junk food, just not as much because I realized that half the time I was eating it, I was eating it because it was there and I could. I'm also aware that I could still be going "better" than I am with some of these changes, but again, I don't worry too much. I'm healthy and going in the right direction still. :)

I made sure I ate 3 meals a day. They weren't always the best meals and still breakfast is often just a bowl of cereal and maybe a piece of fruit or bread even though I know it's better and I feel better if I eat a larger more diverse breakfast. Though I still try, at least once a week, to make breakfast bigger. I'm usually a lot happier when I do that, but my sleep schedule has been wonky for a couple months now and I'm not getting up early enough anymore. I also started added healthier snacks. I tend to have breakfast around 7am. I'll eat a piece of fruit around 10am. I'll eat lunch around noon. I'll have some nuts, a cup of low fat yogurt or whatever around 3 pm. Then I eat a light dinner around 5pm and typically I don't eat again unless I get a major craving. If I get a major craving I tend to give in to it as well. I'm not denying myself. There have been days I've had 3 pieces of cake or a half a dozen donuts. That stuff replaces the fruit usually, but sometimes it is in addition to it. It happens. It makes me happy when I eat it. It makes me happy to know I won't be eating it again for a month or so probably. :)

The big thing here is that with constantly drinking a little water and almost always having some food in my system, I helped kick up my metabolism. By keeping dinner small I'm shutting it down at the proper time. I also try to eat bigger meals after I exercise since the body makes better use of it then.

The other big thing was portions and this was tougher. But I cut back on the amounts of stuff I ate. This helped with eating the junk I still craved, but I did feel hungry for awhile. But by mostly dealing with it, drinking more water and at least waiting a few hours to eat something again instead of just getting more NOW, it paid off. As mentioned I dealt with some hunger pangs and still do every now and then. But I've also noticed that my stomach has shrunk. I get full a lot faster and the more normal portion sizes actually satisfy me now. That took about 4 months to happen. I still cook in larger portions because I don't want to spend as much time cooking, but what used to be 1 or 2 meals is now 3 or 4. :)

The exercise started slowly. But it had to. I had a bit of an "assist" by the fact that we didn't have a car that worked. The job I got when I got back in the work place was over 2 miles away as well. So I had to walk or bike several miles every day. I had been walking to the store for months but that was just once a week. This was every day now. Then I got on a stair stepper we had (I need to get another one), this started bad. 5 minutes killed me, but I set two goals. One was just to get on it 5 times a week. The other was 20 minutes at 1.5 steps a second (each foot going down counted as a step) and I set that a month out. I got there. I added push-ups and sit-ups every now and then, for some more strength training.

When I got the cardio where I could actually do 15 minutes of exercise so I was getting aerobic exercise, and this took a while, I tried to figure out something other than the stepper and push-ups / sit-ups. This is key. You need something you don't mind doing. The stepper worked OK because I'd watch T.V. or movies while I used it and that is why I want to replace the broken one too. But what I settled on was swimming. This won't work for everyone. I swam a lot when I was younger since I was teams. I know how to train, etc. Those first weeks in the water, were good, but hard too. 1000 yards took me an hour that first night, 100 yards continuous left me gasping. But I was getting the exercise. Now I get in do 1000 - 1500 continuous and then do a few work sets. But I knew it was going to take time. :) But if you like to run, do that, ride the bike for exercise. Go lift weights, do jumping jacks, take nature hikes, something you somewhat enjoy so that motivation is easier. :)

I do other little things too. I still try to ride the bike to work now and then. I couldn't this month since it rained nearly every day though. I replace a swim work out with a run or bike or running work out every now and then too just keep things mixed up. It helps. I vary the swim work outs too to help as well.

I don't beat myself up if I don't "stick to" something. I don't count calories. I estimate what I eat in a week, I try to "be good" about what I eat at least 4 days a week, but I don't really think a lot about it, and I never did, except in a few "planning" spurts. I think about it when I go to the store still. If I'm thinking I want cake or cookies I'll review and if I had some within the last week I don't buy the ingredients to make it or a premade, or maybe I will if I'm really craving. :) I do similar checks about going out to eat.

I've gone weeks without exercising. It happens. But then I go and do it again.

The other thing that I've done that ties in with portion control. What I cook for dinner is often lunch the next day (or two). But if I'm not cooking (and I've been doing less because I've not been hungry in the evenings a lot so I end up just having a bowl of cereal or half sandwich or just some fruit and nuts) my lunches have tended to be a Healthy Choice frozen dinner. One of the stores in town almost always has them for $1.50 - $2.00 so I kinda stock up on them. That becomes lunch and lately it's been about 3 times a week. That keeps me limited on intake as well and with the fruit snacks at work I'm usually not hungry. Many of these meals are actually tasty and the only real negative is they are still higher in sodium but for me that is not an issue.

So I've gotten to the point now, where I eat what I should and that means most exercise is just pure extra burn. 1 pound is about 3500 calories. I swim 3 to 4 times a week and those workouts burn about 700 - 800 calories each. That's most of my loss at 2100 - 3200 a week since I averaged just over a pound a week in loss. The other 300 - 1400 probably comes from the push-ups / sit-ups or going for a run. The fact that when I need to use the restroom at work I go from the 1st floor I work on to the 3rd floor (it's only a 3 story building) helps. I park farther away in the parking lots when I go to work/store so that I have to walk a few extra steps, etc. I intentionally walk around when I'm on the phone too.

I didn't obsess about any of it (usually). There are days I've been unmotivated and I've texted or called a friend to have them give me a little kick in the butt to go do a bit more. There were a few days I counted calories very closely and chided myself. But mostly the counting was done to help get a measure. Paying too close attention was more of a negative motivator for me.

That is what the Move and Lose Challenge on campus did for me. I average 1.6 pounds a week for that, which was better than what I had been doing on my own. The extra loss was really because I was surrounded by other folks and getting reminders from other folks to help with motivation. So I was more likely to go swim. I was more likely to go for an extra run or run extra distance. I was less likely to grab snack food. I was more likely to just go walk during a break. I got complimented on my progress. It helped. :)
So that is pretty much what I did. I can't really provide more details since I don't have them. I changed portions to help shrink the stomach, I added some more exercise. I changed eating habits to get more water and eat less more frequently. That's what it boils down to. :)

Final Weigh in

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 16:00:27 GMT

Alright so the final weigh in for the challenge was today.   I took the shoes of took the cell phone, keys, wallet, and change out of the pockets too.

The final number 193.6.   Total weight loss 19.8 pounds in 12 weeks.   So I kept up my pace. I'm happy. :)

I'm still about 10 pounds overweight by BMI and I can agree. I still get to see the fat on the gut and thighs in the shower every morning. Don't get me wrong. It's not bad, I just think I can get to 180 or so assuming I don't add any more muscle mass. I've actually probably got 20 more pounds of fat that I could shed before I'd get in the 10-15% body fat range. I'm guessing I'm around 20% +/- 2% right now using some of the simple calculators out there. I haven't had any real measures done (like caliper or immersion).   But for a male in my age range, from what I've read below 16% is considered excellent, 17-21% is good, 22 - 25% is fair, 26% and up is risky. I'll agree with that too. I'm fair to good right now. But I believe I can get to excellent. :)

The body fat is the real measure I care about it's just not as easy to get a good number for. However weight and waist measurement estimators work fairly well for me since I carry most of my fat in the belly (as do most but not all men). The estimators for women actually tend to use weight, wrist, waist, hip and forearm measurements because most women tend to carry the weight more evenly.

So yes since the scale is what has been giving me the metric, I've been watching the other indicators. :) I'm very happy with my progress. I'm pretty happy with how I look too, but I can tweak that shape some more and be even better so I don't see why I won't keep doing what I'm doing. :) Eventually the loss is going to stop itself since I am eating a healthy diet, and getting appropriate exercise. When I get to where my body should be for that activity and consumption level I'll stay there. :) My estimate is that is around the 180 mark with a 33 inch or so waist which would put me around 15% body fat, where I want to be. :)

I'm officially single again

Mon, 26 Oct 2009 21:45:40 GMT

Judgement was signed today, the divorce is finalized.

Initial reaction. Relieved.

I'm not sad at all, all those feelings happened in the past.

That's all for now, just a quick update.

Interesting Morning

Wed, 14 Oct 2009 14:58:01 GMT

First, this rain is driving me nuts. It's been going on for nearly 2 and a half weeks now!

Second, in the short time I've got before all the meetings start I just wanted to relay the interesting morning.

Most of automated jobs that work with the Advance data in Columbia have been turned off since Friday because of server upgrades going on. Some things we ran by hand a few times to make sure they didn't conflict and data was still available, some of it was just not possible.

So the upgrades finished and we turned on the processes. We also had a code promotion last night (that I ran). So we check the system e-mails and one of the jobs was not happy and sending e-mail every 10 minutes. Turns out that Carla didn't have the library in the review/promotion process so it didn't get promoted and several of the scripts were trying to use a new function. I have never reverted a promotion, though I was pretty sure I knew how. The promotion manager who I replaced had never done one and the other promotion was not in yet. So I had to figure out how to get that done.

Then I had to rerun a few things by hand.

Now I've got Dave the overly anal doing one of my code reviews that was already reviewed by 2 others so I'll get to sped an hour or so saying why I'm not changing the pointless things he doesn't like.

Anyway off to meetings. :)

196.4 Wootage!

Tue, 13 Oct 2009 14:47:24 GMT

So it's been 2 weeks since I weighed in thanks to being sick last week. 196.4 the scale told me today. I appear to have no ability to judge my own weight as I really thought I'd be around 203. I just figured since I hadn't been working out, hadn't really been eating healthy at all either and that my pants were feeling tighter yesterday and today that I had gone up. I think that pants was just because I'm cinching the belt tighter though. :) 17 pounds now since the start of the competition though. It's nice to keep seeing progress like that. :) That puts me at 7.966% loss since the start. Each week the leader in loss for the men is posted and it's been 3.321 -- 4.395 -- 4.320 -- 6.251 -- 7.715 -- 6.693 -- 9.083 -- 9.668 -- 7.081. It's always been Joel (I don't know him), Karl, or Matt (I work with Karl and Matt). So I guess I do have a chance at that. There are 2 more weigh-ins to go so we'll see. :) It's nice to know that my normal activity, plus just a little more could put me ahead of folks that are working hard at this (some folks that joined this competition are very gung ho).

Oddly I can still see where another 15-20 pounds could come off too. I reached the December goal, in October. That's something to be happy about. :)

I didn't bring my swimming gear with me today. I should have. I need to do some focused exercise again here now that I'm healthy again. Maybe I'll go this evening, though I really don't like going that late. Over lunch works, but it has it's own issues. I miss being able to go right after work like I could in the summer. Ah well I'll do what I'm able to do. :) I'm still watching my budget to see if I can afford a membership at The Center and then I could go in the morning or possibly right after work (I forget the exact hours for the pool there).

Work still goes well. Though I'm not really busy with anything critical as being out for 4 days I was able to get caught up in just 2 and I'm actually doing work right now that our student workers typically do. Hopefully they get the Desktop Management client installed on my system today so I can start working on that project.

I'm glad I'm not working T1 or T2 right now though. We had a conflickr virus break out on campus systems. Though it was clamped down pretty quick as so far only 36 systems have been hit. The rules our security guys have in place that isolated subnet 53 (which is an IT subnet sadly) stopped much of the spread, but it's shown up on a few student machines which means it's not contained. Student systems are much harder to keep clean than staff. But that isn't where I work so it doesn't really affect me directly. :)

Ah well I should get back to work instead of typing up thoughts. :)

A year ago today

Sun, 11 Oct 2009 00:20:57 GMT

So a year ago today was a Friday, not a Saturday. I had fixed Patti's bike since it had the adjustable seat. I went to the bike store and get a rack for it, then to the library to get some Algebra text books so that I could study up for the test trying to become a tutor at Sylvan Learning Center (wish this branch hadn't closed). I also got new a new set of brakes for the rear wheel. I was riding it with only front brakes.

It was very difficult for me to get out of the house that day. I didn't have my cell phone yet, I know I was very nervous and wanted to be able to talk to folks but didn't have a way. I actually took a really long time locking up the bike at the library working myself up to be able to go in. When I got in, I had to get my library card, my old one from 94 was no longer on file. :) I also remember asking if they had any job opportunities.

I would have been cooking dinner right about now as I post this. I don't remember what I cooked but I do remember cooking something trying to have it ready by 8. I reviewed like 6 or 7 chapters in that text book that day too. The rest of it of on Sat and Sun cause I took the test on Monday.

I know that the 8th, Wednesday, was the day that I really started things. That was the day I made the phone calls, but this was the day, one year ago, when I actually went out and did something.

A lot has changed. I face a much more normal set of problems in my life now. :) But there is still much for me to do. There is more I want to make of myself, do with myself. This was a good year. I plan to have another good one too. :)

201.4 - I'm back on pace

Tue, 29 Sep 2009 15:31:31 GMT

I realize that most of my updates lately have been about the weekly weigh in. But at least I'm still updating. :)

So as the subject says the scale read 201.4 today. Attempting to push under 200 sooner failed, but the loss rate is still good. That is 12 pounds since Aug 4th, or 8 weeks, which is exactly 1.5 pounds a week on average. Of course as you can read back and see I've had some 3 pound weeks and some 0.4 pound weeks, etc. :) In terms of the competition that is 5.62% loss since the start. I only get to see the leader (who was at 9.08% last week) so I'm not sure exactly how other folks are doing, but I'm happy. I'll remind again that I was 250 at the end of last October. This is so fantastic. :)

Work continues to go well. It's been a bit slower lately, and I'm getting really tired of updating old code, but that is the majority of what I've had available. We had a meeting with the Desktop Management / Desktop Enhancement folks this morning to get a better idea of what they want reports on and to get a little more familiar with the product. It's an MS product, their Configuration Manager, and there are some problems posed from the start in getting it to do what I want easily, but I think I'll be able to get them what they need.

I'm mostly comfortable with the Promotion Manager processes now. It's not quite fully routine, but it will be soon. Those happen again tonight for me, so this is another at work till 6pm or so.

There was an add for assistant swimming coaches in the paper. I responded via phone and e-mail as it asked but still have not heard back. I really want to do that, so I'll follow up again today I think. It was paid, but I'd volunteer at this point I think, even though spare cash is always nice, and I've been looking for a bit of seasonal work anyway. :)

The Taurus still seems happy, when I get paid tomorrow I've got a few things I'm gonna have checked again when I do the oil change. But it's been driving just fine. The checks are just preventative. Call me crazy, but when you have one catch on fire while driving it, and it was something that was very likely preventable, I'd like to think I learned my lesson. It's also made me realize that very few people seem to use their garage for cars, besides me. :)

Anyway back to work after the weekly weigh in update. :)

And I'm paying for past mistakes now

Tue, 22 Sep 2009 21:11:15 GMT

So I was looking at my advanced pay stub online today (I get paid the 30th but they have everything processed and I can see what will be done well before that) and I see that my wages are being garnished. 25% of my pay, after taxes, just gone, and I had no clue this was coming. I know I have bad debts out there I'm working on them. I thought I had made agreements on all of them within the last month.

Well after doing some digging, turns out what I thought was the agreement for this debt was for a different one of similar size... My complete and total screw up. I'm pretty much unable to do anything right now as the amount being garnished is actually less than the amount they would take in payments at the moment. I'm garnished for 6 months (till March).

This sucks and I'm scrambling to see if I can reduce what I'm paying on other debts until this is done. My budget can take it (though I'm not paying back loans to family members now because of it) but it's not how I wanted to deal with things.

The really sad thing is that had I filed for bankruptcy I'd be better off now than trying to take care of this crap the right way. Oh the joys of getting sick and being out of work for 3 years....

Yes I'm talking with one of those debt consolidation places too, but it's not looking much better right now. The garnished amount is pretty much what I was trying to keep my total debt repayment levels (including the student loan stuff I had rehabbed) at. I just have to be better with discretionary budget and other stuff.

Or I go back to 50-60 hour work weeks like I was doing for much of Nov/Dec/Jan and parts of March.

At least I'm slightly better able to deal with this than I was months ago. At least I'm still going in the right direction, it was just an annoying thing to find out and spend my day tracking down.

Ah well, I've dealt with worse crap.

202.8 better than I thought

Tue, 22 Sep 2009 14:27:38 GMT

So this week had started off with a strong push to try and get under 200 by today. But my eating habits also went out the window a couple of times. I had a day where I just couldn't stop eating and while I tried to eat things that were better for me I still ate a ton, and last night I had way to much to eat as well, but eh. :) A few of the swimming workouts were simply not good as well. I've been getting foot cramps again, and one day it was so crowded it was hard to get anything done. Sadly I tweaked my left hamstring on Sunday (I don't know how or when because it didn't really hurt till Monday morning) so I didn't do anything yesterday and I'll likely not do anything today. But as mentioned despite all that, I still had a loss. :)

I'm still happy to have seen a loss, even if it wasn't where I wanted it to be. I'm still well ahead of pace. Still down over 10 pounds in just 6 weeks since this tracking from the competition started. It's all good. :) I don't let missing mini-goals really throw me off.

I'm really enjoying the new bicycle. The new car seems to be working out, but I admit to having feelings of "OK so when will this thing just up and die on me and screw me over" too.

Today being Tuesday means it's a "long" day at work since I've got a couple of promotions to do tonight. I want to swim over lunch but again, I should rest the hamstring a bit more I figure.

Ah well back to work, just a little update. :)

Car go Beep Beep!

Thu, 17 Sep 2009 15:54:58 GMT

So I'm trying to purchase a 2002 Ford Taurus. But they are being slow getting it ready for me to go get. Was going to get it last night after work, not ready, 9am this morning, not ready. Waiting for a call back now.

I'll be carrying comprehensive on this one I learned my lesson last time, and I'll be getting the oil changed myself and have a few other things checked early too. But it seems like a very solid car. I'm just anxious.

Took yesterday off as far as exercising. I was a little down on myself for that, but I think it was a good thing. I feel much more motivated today.

Really enjoying riding the new bike. The hybrid style was definitely the way to go for me I think. Though I need to adjust the rear derailleur as there is some chatter when I'm on the high front sprocket. I get a free tune up 30 days after purchase as well, but this is one I can adjust. I spend most of my time on the high front too so I want it happy when there. :)

So even with the car I'll be riding to work a fair bit anyway, and that is good too. :)

The plants I got over labor day weekend are all still alive, this is a good thing. I have not fully decided where I want all of them in the house yet, but they are already making the place nicer. Still considering something I could maybe do as a hanging basket by the front door.

I also still need to get some wood for that fireplace. It's going to be a great time to have it here in a month or two.

Anyway that's the quick update today. :)

203.2 getting ever so close

Tue, 15 Sep 2009 14:29:38 GMT

So it's Tuesday, that means weigh in for the move and lose challenge, today I was at 203.2.   Again I was 213.4 on Aug 4th. So 10.2 pounds in 6 weeks or 1.7 pounds a week on average. That is better than what I had been doing before the challenge so it's been good for me. :) I've lost 4.78% of my starting body weight. :) This makes me happy, but since I've been in a bit of a gloomy mood, I do wonder where I'll need to get so that this belly fat isn't showing up so much from a side view. :) But I should be sub 200 by the end of the month. :) It's good to see positive results still for doing the right thing. :)

I really want to get under 200 again though. That was my original goal (since revised of course), so that is why I'm getting excited.   At this pace I'll be at 193 at the end of the competition. My last weight goal was 190 by December. :)

I've picked up muscle mass too. The swimming has really helped with that. I like how my arms and shoulders look again. My legs look pretty good too. :)

I have a bike that works again and rode it to work. Sure I kinda had to since I don't have a car again, but I will be doing more of that I know. And I'll just go for rides to go for rides, that will help. Still should force myself to run more often, that really helps too, but I'm still pretty lazy. That's the beauty of doing this loss the right way. I simply changed my lifestyle, starting with eating habits, so it's something I can stick with. The exercise is also a habit, but I don't have to do it everyday. This all works to just do it when I can, and occasionally when I don't want to, but make myself anyway. :)

I liked getting this good news. I've mentioned a few times lately that I've been pretty blah. The stress of losing the car, actually signing the divorce papers, getting rejected for loans (expected but still it's not fun), etc it's worn me down a bit. Exercise has been a struggle. But this should help keep me motivated. :) Getting this close is good. Heck it had me thinking about trying to accelerate it a bit, but when I realize that 1.7 pounds a week is averaging out to burning about 850 more calories a day than I consume, I'm not sure I want to try. :) Though really 850 calories is really only like an hour of swimming. :)

I'm liking what the scale tells me.  I'm liking what I see in the mirror, though I still have a few things I want to be better than they are, and I'm getting there.

It's a long process, but it's been so worth it. It's really helped keep me happier. :)   I'm getting excited to get to where I want to be and then see what's it is like to just stay there. :) That's a few months out still, but I'll get to see it. :)

Just stuff

Mon, 14 Sep 2009 14:19:47 GMT

This is not a cheery entry. I'm in a blah mood and just want to whine a bit. you've been warned.

So I still haven't found another car. I was trying to see if I could get financing but I still have some issues with my credit report that aren't cleared up and I can't. So I've got to get something that was going to be in the range of my down payment. Ah well. I knew my credit rating was utter crap, but I figured I'd see what I could do. I kept the rental car longer than I should have and spent too much on it, even with discounted rates. I should have turned it in sooner and used the other money to get that newer bike I've been eying so that I ride more. Ah well.

I do have, thanks to yet another loan from family members, the money to get a used one, but I'm so gun shy now and honestly am not a big fan of the car shopping process, especially when it's a pretty immediate need. I'll find something, it's still a bit of a buyers market on used cars, but I still don't like doing it. I might hit some of the lots this time and not just go through http://shopping.rollanet.org/category/407/Cars.html which does have a fair bit.

We've had our first reported case of H1N1 (swine flu) here on campus. It was expected with the students returning, and like most folks who get it, the symptoms are more mild than standard strains. But it is here.

I've not been wanting to exercise lately either, but I've been forcing myself to, and then I end up having very productive workouts but I don't feel as good after them. It's just a phase, I'll get through it.

I'm getting stuff done at work, but I'm still not feeling very productive. That bothers me.

I'll see about swimming over lunch again today. I think I do prefer going in the evenings, but don't want to deal with the lack of vehicle tonight. Though I'm getting a little worried about how the bottoms of my feet are always sore, and like to cramp up after 45 minutes or so in the water. I've tried self massage on them a few days in a row now, and it helps but not enough. I need someone who can do that for me. I could really use a shoulder/back massage too. Ah well.

OK that's enough whining. I need to get back to the positive, but I'll try and save that for another post or something.

Burning cars and other crazy things

Wed, 09 Sep 2009 19:14:25 GMT

So my car caught fire on Friday. It caught on fire while I was driving it.

I had taken a day off from work to get a 4 day weekend, I was heading to Fargo, ND (820 mile drive) to see some friends. I was about 70 miles into the trip. I noticed what I thought was white exhaust in my rear window. So I thought that I might be burning coolant. I was about a mile from a gas station and I was concerned so I slowed down. When I did that, the whole rear window was blocked out with white exhaust. So I pulled off the highway immediately. A truck that had been behind me pulled off in front of me, the driver of the truck jumped out and grabbed a gallon jug out of the back of the truck and ran back to my car shouting "You're on fire!" I was already out of the vechicle and heading to the back and sure enough as I got down to look under the vehicle the rear differential was in flames. I checked for a fire extinguisher in the car and removed my suit case and laptop from the hatch (left the pillow and the laundry bag that had the shoes in it). I didn't have one. He didn't either. The water did get the differential to not have visible flames but there was still smoke.

I got my dress clothes out of the back seat, I got all the stuff off the front seats. I still forgot about the pillow and the laundry bag. My digital camera was in the storage compartment between the front seats I had forgotten about it too. Emergency services was called. I called my insurance company (GEICO) as I thought I was covered. They started a claim and got a tow truck dispatched. I called my work and talked to James, a co-worker. He called my director, John, who lives about 8 miles south of Jeff City and was working from home on Friday (his daughter was sick and his dad is in the hospital in Columbia). I was about 10 miles N of Jeff City. John said that he was willing to get me.

The Ashland FD showed up like 15 minutes after we called (pretty good response since we were 15 miles away). By the time they got there, flames were visible in the wheel well on the driver side, rear. The car was full of smoke. They got the hoses pulled from the tanker truck quickly and started to hose off the car, they ripped all the stuff out of the hatch, including the forgotten pillow and shoe bag. My umbrella and road Atlas were also forgotten in the back seat.

The fire chief told me that I was lucky, the fire had done damage very close to the fuel tank. The brake lines had been melted and most of that was what was burning at the end. No one is quite sure what happened, but the car was totaled even with the quick response times. GEICO called back about the time John showed up and let me know that they would not be paying out on the claim or for the tow. I had not in fact changed my policy.

The tow truck arrived and I asked if they could just tow to a salvage yard. He couldn't the yards won't take anything unless the battery is out, the gas tank has an obvious hole in it, and something else. We worked a deal they would take the car, I would mail them the title and I would only have to pay $100 for the tow (which would have been $200 or so because GEICO doesn't work with the companies in Jeff City so they came like 25 miles from Columbia). So my Subaru is no more, or at least no longer mine.

John got me back to Rolla around noon. I pulled off the road about 9am as an FYI. I was going to just do a half day work, but I decided I wanted my weekend. So I rented a car and hit the road at like 2:30 - 3:00 towards Fargo.

There were a ton of cops out, I expected that. I was going about 4 MPH over the speed limit most of the time which kept me mostly in the traffic flow. I saw about 20 people pulled over in that 820 miles. As I was pulling up to the light at the end of my exit into Fargo and I was literally about half a mile from my destination I see the lights from the cop come on behind me, it was about 2:30 AM.

I can't figure out the windows on rental, I had them locked or something so I have to open the door. The officer asks for my license, I ended up handing him my S&T ID... I realize it before he says anything and get the license out and apologize. He asks me to go back to his vehicle and runs the license. He tells me I was going 65 on the interstate and that the limit is 55 in the city limits. He let me off with a warning and then I got back in and finished the drive.

The rest of the weekend was a lot of fun though. I didn't get back to Rolla till about 2:30 AM Monday night/Tuesday Morning. Got to sleep about a quarter to 4 got up about quarter after 6 and got back into my normal work routine. :)

So that was my weekend.

This morning Patti and I signed the paperwork for the divorce. It should be filed today or tomorrow, then there is a 30 day waiting period in Missouri and after that is done, the lawyer said that it typically takes the judge 2-3 weeks to sign, so I guess I'm still married till November or so it seems. I consider myself single now though. Hell I've considered myself single for a few months, I think she's felt that way even longer.

So that is my life right now. I'm looking for another car now.

Swam over lunch today. Holding at about 207 pounds but I was a bit lazier last week. I should lose a bit more this week.

Anyway lunch is done, back to work for me. :)

Some more good news

Wed, 02 Sep 2009 23:06:18 GMT

So the car is fixed, new sensor is in and it was for the original price quoted. This is good. :)

I've picked up some additional duties at work. I'm going to be one of our promotion managers. That is I will manage the promotions of code. Basically I'll have access to the production environment and be able to promote the SVN versions that are in test/dev to production following our procedures. It's not a big deal, just means I'll be getting off work at 6 or so on Tuesday nights, but I can flex that time. That means that I won't have to come in early and/or leave later if I want to swim over lunch because I'll get a couple hours of extra time on Tuesdays. :) I may have to deal with an emergency break/fix promotion from time to time, but those happen like 2 times a semester.

I've also got my first project that I'm lead on. The Desktop Management reporting tool. I'll be supporting a vendor product that our Desktop (Tier 2 system support the job I worked before) and Desktop Infrastructure teams use to manage assets and software. I'll become an expert on the tool and basically be able to assist in generating reports for them. The product is still in the eval phase and I haven't even looked at it as I just got the info at the end of the work day today.

So that's all cool for me and stuff. :)

This weeks update

Tue, 01 Sep 2009 14:38:08 GMT

Move and Lose update.

206.4 on the scale this morning. 7 pounds since the start of the challenge, 3.28%.   The challenge has actually helped accelerate the loss, that's good. And again I'm gonna be happy about the fact that I was 250 at the end of October last year. :) So I need to be at 198 at the end of this October so I can average that really healthy 1 pound a week. :) And since I've got 8 weeks till then I'm right on pace. :)

Work continues to go well, nothing special to report. I'm settled in to the job. I'm getting better at coding perl, I'm getting better with SQL.

I like the new house. I made some banana bread Sunday night. I'll probably make some more tomorrow night as the bananas will be good for it.

Car has a bad temperature sensor that should get replaced this week, couple hundred is the cost, but it should fix the rough start problems, and help the fuel mileage and turn off the darn check engine light. :)

Swimming over lunch most days again.   Want to try and swim 3 or 4 times a week and run 1 or 2. Still haven't started lifting weights like I keep saying I should. :)

I kinda have a normal boring life it appears when I look at it from that view. I'll take that after what the last couple of years were like. Normal is good. :)   Healthy is good.

I do think I'm going to do some clothes shopping this week though. Tired of how ill fitting all this old large stuff is. :)

Move and Lose Challenge update

Tue, 25 Aug 2009 15:57:07 GMT

So the IT team I'm on is currently in 3rd place. The other team is in 7th (there are 14 teams) though 2 of my members still haven't reported points yet so we could move up or down (it's average points per person).

Had another weigh in today. I was 207.8. I guess being sick over the weekend made up for being lazy. :) I was 213.4 on the 4th so 5.6 pounds since this started which is a 2.6% loss (the weight loss winner is done by percentage). Last week the current leader for the men was at 4.4% so like I figured I'm not winning that one. :)

I've been made our team leader as well. We need to come up with a good challenge (each team needs to come up with at least one, there is one challenge per week during the competition). The first week was a 1.5 mile walking course. This week it's to make sure you drink the proper amount of water at least 5 out of 7 days (which is a cinch for me since I do that all the time). So if you have any ideas for a challenge that is supposed to help people live a healthier lifestyle, let me know. :)

I got in the pool again last night. I got a foot cramp 30 some odd minutes in and didn't get a lot of yardage either. The 7:30 PM start time is a bit odd now after the months of the 4:30 or 5 starts. I'm gonna try and go over lunch today as I think I'll be too tired to swim tonight, up too late last night. :) But it was good to get back in the water.

I even found my paddles, and put them on for a set and realized that I need to do more work with them. My form is pretty bad still it seems, the paddles really help point that out. I just use the Hans style (http://www.hanspaddles.com/) and if you don't have good form you can feel it. I've always had a messed up freestyle so that is part of why I wanted the paddles. But the pool was getting crowded and I didn't want to really mess with drill sets with that many folks so I took them off and just did some regular pull sets without them. :)

But this weight loss thing is cool. I've nearly got my waist down to a 36. I want that before I get any new clothes as they will still fit OK if I get to my real goal of a 34. :) Yes I started at a 40 on my dress pants. I'm very reliant on belts now. :)

Happiness is a state of mind

Mon, 24 Aug 2009 16:23:31 GMT

We hear that a lot. Well maybe not a lot. But I bet you've heard that phrase. Of course it's true. Sadness, anger, boredom, they are all states of mind, pretty much by definition. :) But the meaning of the phrase is typically intended to be interpreted as you can by happy by just wanting to be happy.

Now there is some truth to this. I've mentioned my "cycle" on here before. I'm heading into a down swing, it's easier for me to get down, and I was sick on Friday and Saturday which doesn't help either. So I had a hard time getting out of bed this morning, just wanted to sleep. So I literally made myself. Then I thought about the simple little things that are good about my life. Then the bigger things that are good about my life. Then about the people who make my life better and then about how I can make things better for folks around me, etc. It wasn't too long before I was in a pretty decent mood. Sure I've been in better moods, but I've been in much worse as well. :)

I also got to transfer that to an old friend from High School on Facebook with a simple

Yep, force yourself to be happy. Just look at the good moments, make yourself smile and drive on. :)

I had the same issue this morning and sure I'm not as happy as some other days, but it does work.

Of course comments from people you went to High School 15+ years ago that you haven't seen in 15+ years cheer you up, so you won't need to force anything, I'm just that darn good at making people smile. No really. Oh you know it's true. Smile darn it! :)

And she reported that yep it did make her smile and we chatted for a little bit. That of course made me smile more. :)

So yep I've become one of those damn sappy cheerful buggers that you sometimes just want to punch in the face. But I don't care. :)

So all you buggers that actually read this, you can smile too dang nabit! Do eeet! Do eeet! You know you want to! Come on if you don't want to thinking about punching the cheerful bugger in the face has to make you smile right?

Alright if you still haven't smiled all I have to say is "Bah you're no fun!" :-p Of course I've not been funny. Cheerful isn't funny, it's cheerful. Geez. :)

Ants. In the 3rd floor bathroom....

Wed, 19 Aug 2009 20:14:48 GMT

OK so as part of this wellness program I decided to follow one of the tips given in the flyer that says don't use the bathroom on the same floor you work on. I work on the first floor of a 3 story building. I decided to use the 3rd floor bathroom just because. It is also clear across the building as well.

The 3rd floor bathroom also has a nice bank of windows high up and just has better lighting. It's a better experience and going to the bathroom is all about the experience right?

Well the other day I used the stall nearest the outside wall and the windows and I noticed ants on the wall. There are no ants in the 1st floor bathroom, which is actually mostly below the outside ground level. There are no ants in any other rooms in this building actually, I spoke to a janitor about because I was curious. He said this is the 3rd year they have shown up in that rest room during the summer. They have not been able to locate where they are coming from or where they are getting in as the windows have all been recaulked (I even verified that).

It's a bit of a mystery. And why are they there? Do they do have log rolling competitions on un-flushed human waste? Are they all in there on double dog dares from other ants?

There aren't many of them, there apparently never are. The janitors have never seen more than 6 in there at a time. They almost never go on the floor, they stay on the walls. They will go all over the room but generally just on the walls. And yes I've spent an entire 20 minute break in this room a few times just to watch them. I've never seen more than a total of 4.

Is that bathroom some high security ant research facility? Is this where their take over of the world is going to start? Am I now part of the experiment?

They are strange ants too. They are black and red, I believe they are http://bugguide.net/node/view/23631 I'm not used to two tone ants. What have they been doing to get that way? Is this a super ant that has combined the best of the two common colors? It maybe an http://www.pestproducts.com/alleghenyant.htm ( http://www.myrmecos.net/formicinae/ForExs4.html ) I shall have to look closer.

Oh well I need to use the facilities again so I'll go see if there are any up there right now. It's odd.

Craig figured it out!

Tue, 11 Aug 2009 19:16:54 GMT

The new apartment and a few other things

Tue, 11 Aug 2009 15:53:54 GMT

The hole in the bedroom wall is fixed. The doorbell is fixed, the screen door on the patio is fixed, the screen on the bedroom window is fixed, the exterior lights are fixed, the mailbox is fixed. I didn't actually look to see if the mold was cleaned.

I still haven't fully unpacked and organized. The place still feels so big that I realized I'm leaving some stuff lying around to just take up space. :) I've also changed my mind on how to set up the bedroom a couple of times. :) The 2nd bedroom is still not organized at all though I do have my other desk in there finally so that I can use it.

My appointment with the attorney is on Wednesday at 2:30 so we should get papers filed soon. Since it's uncontested there won't be a court date. It will just be 30 days after filing a judge will look sign and then it's done. That is the nutshell version. So I'll be officially divorced in a little more than a month it seems.

The Subaru is still chugging along, though the check engine light is back on and I still haven't fixed the parking break release button. I'll get to that sooner rather than later.

I made my last payment on the plan to get my Direct Loans out of default. I've not gotten the info on transitioning that to normal payback methods yet. It still looks like it will be a bit less per month than I was paying to get it rehabbed, but I think it will be more than I initially estimated. But I need to get that going before I really tackle the other debts. :)

Did the weekly weigh in for the Move and Lose Challenge. 211.4 so supposedly 2 pounds since last week. We'll see.

I've planned out a route for a run tonight that should allow me to easily extend or shorten the distance depending on how I'm feeling. I've got my tracking sheet started and found some old data and put it in there as well. Much of it is estimated as I don't always take a stop watch with me. But I did on my last 3.1 mile run so I've got some more solid baselines now.

Work still goes well. I'm getting things done.

Not a lot else to say right now. :)